Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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