I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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