stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize