he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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