she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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