I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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