My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize