i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
