I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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