U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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