so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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