ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
