So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize