He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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