Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
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