I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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