I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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