when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
