This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
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I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
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I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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