called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
