Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
my shit smells like andre
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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