I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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