I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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