I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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