PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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