I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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