Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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