oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
