One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize
