Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
My life is pants optional.
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