somebody snuck up and got me drunk
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
