Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
farters have to be the big spoon...
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
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Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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