Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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