I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Sober January is a disaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize