I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Damn victory sex feels great
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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