your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
