Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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