Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
