Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
So vagazzling was a success
I am available for nakedness
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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