Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
