pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
People in love make me want to vomit
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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