Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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