Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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