i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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