dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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