I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
