I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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