you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize