Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize