I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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