Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
