How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
